Going through a divorce can take its toll. Many people don’t feel like themselves for quite a while after. It is important to know that you are not alone and that over time, you will adjust and find a new normal. Here are ten things you can do to help you and your family recover.
1. Give Yourself Time
It is common, after divorce, to feel the urge to move on immediately. But your relationship probably didn’t break down quickly, and the divorce process may have been drawn out. So don’t assume that you’ll recover from the trauma overnight. Give yourself a whole year to adjust to new routines and getting through milestones like holidays and special events.
2. Take Care of Yourself
Focus on looking after your needs first. Ensuring that you get enough rest and maintain a healthy diet will make it easier for you to deal with the stress and handle the things that haven’t changed, like caring for kids, work and other obligations.
3. Exercise Your Frustrations Away
Vigorous physical activity releases endorphins which promote feelings of well-being. Not only will you rid yourself of feelings of frustration, but you’ll feel better for having made a healthy choice.
4. Be Sad
While your situation may have changed, there were good times and happy memories as well. Treat the breakdown of a marriage as a loss and allow yourself to grieve without feeling guilty.
5. Slow it Down
Take the time to recognize that the emotional upheaval of recovering from a divorce is exhausting. You may feel like you have less energy and feel more tired. So slow down your life a little until you start to feel more energetic. Take a break from volunteering or from your side hustle and enjoy a little more time off.
6. Talk to People
You may feel like you don’t want to talk to anyone about your divorce or recovery experience. However, if the people around you know what you’re going through, they can help support you. Just be sure you say thanks, but no thanks to those people who offer you advice. What worked for them may not be appropriate for you.
7. Support the Kids
Children are often caught in the crossfire during a divorce. They can sometimes fall into feeling like they are to blame or feel helpless about their new situation. Be sure that they get the support they need to adjust without taking on any of the stress.
8. Get Support for Yourself
It helps to align yourself with a group of people who may have experienced divorce and recovered in a healthy way. Look for a support group in your area and regularly attend the meetings to regain your sense of stability.
9. Do it Your Way
Understand that there is no recipe for recovery from divorce. You may have good days and bad days, advances and setbacks. Take care of yourself and your children, and don’t put pressure on any of you to ‘get over it.’
Perhaps you have recently realized that filing for divorce is the best option for your family or are beginning to considering it. Either way, get in touch with a family law attorney to answer your questions and help you navigate the process. A divorce lawyer can inform you about mediation options and ensure that your rights and the rights of your children are protected. The Law Office of Stephanie Krane-Boehmer is here to help you with separation and divorce matters, including child custody and parenting agreements. Call us for an appointment or book a virtual consultation on our website.